Three Schneiders: Dec 3, 2010

Friday, December 3, 2010

Peaceful Parenting & Positive Discipline

Ask and you shall receive my friends! After posting on Facebook this morning that Louie & I attended a seminar on Peaceful Parenting last night at Cintas, I received about a dozen comments or emails asking to share the resources from the talk. I thought this would be the easiest way to get them all in one place. So - here you go. (We've been following these philosophies since Josie was a wee little thing, with great success and we highly recommend checking this stuff out!) Enjoy!

POSITIVE DISCIPLINE & PEACEFUL PARENTING RESOURCES

BOOKS:

Positive Discipline for Pre-schoolers by Jane Nelson http://www.amazon.com/Positive-Discipline-Preschoolers-Years--Raising-Responsible/dp/0307341607/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1291388555&sr=1-1

The Discipline Book by Dr. Sears http://www.amazon.com/Discipline-Book-Better-Behaved-Child-Birth/dp/0316779032/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1291388481&sr=8-1

The No-Cry Discipline Solution by Elizabeth Pantley http://www.amazon.com/No-Cry-Discipline-Solution-Encourage-Behavior/dp/0071471596/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1291388481&sr=8-2

Everyday Blessings: The Inner Work of Mindful Parenting by Jon Kabat-Zinn http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0786883146/ref=ord_cart_shr?ie=UTF8&m=ATVPDKIKX0DER

Unconditional Parenting by Alfie Kohn http://www.amazon.com/Unconditional-Parenting-Moving-Rewards-Punishments/dp/0743487486/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1291389308&sr=8-1 (Note: there’s a DVD of this too that’s available on Amazon – or check the library.)

The Parents’ Tao Te Ching by William Martin http://www.amazon.com/Parents-Tao-Te-Ching-Ancient/dp/1569246629/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1291389974&sr=8-1

WEBSITES & BLOGS:

Positive Discipline Overview http://www.positivediscipline.com/what-is-positive-discipline.html

Jane Nelson’s Positive Discipline Products Website: http://www.positivediscipline.com/

Peaceful Parenting Blog: http://www.peacefulparenting.com/blog/

Peaceful Parent Institute: http://www.peaceful-parent.com/

Beech Acres, Strength-Based Practical Parenting: http://www.beechacres.org/Strength-based-Practical-Parenting.aspx

Mindfulness (and Parenting): http://mindful.org/at-home/parenting

Youtube VIDEOS:

Positive Discipline Video on YouTube (by Jane Nelson) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f-e4H2rsEww

Alfie Kohn on Time-outs & Punishment: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRE2gqjQx5Q

Alfie Kohn of Reward & Over-Praise: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QQesSzkZW4s

Ten Ways Attachment Parenting Makes Discipline Easier (Dr. Bill Sears & Martha Sears) – audio only http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x70rqAv1r-c&feature=related

FACEBOOK GROUPS:

· http://www.facebook.com/positivediscipline

· http://www.facebook.com/peacefulparenting

· http://www.facebook.com/AttachmentParenting

Things I've Learned So Far

When on bedrest, cravings are satisfied in bulk. A chai tea latte is not out of reach. It will arrive as a case of six 32-oz cartons courtesy of Amazon prime in two business days.
Fall/Winter maternity clothes are infinitely more expensive, uncomfortable, and ugly than Spring/Summer maternity clothes! (And I miss my flip-flops already!)
BELIEVE in miracles!
If your two-year old tells you that you need to be more patient, she's probably right.
Moving is hard. Moving with a toddler is even harder.
There are no guarantees.
Don't let your two-year old pick out the kind of Valentine's Day cards she wants to make. There's a good chance she's overly-ambitious.
Take nothing for granted.
If you pay close enough attention, your little one will totally show you the right path in most situations. They're wise little souls. We should give them more credit. And we should follow their lead.
If your child is doing some well/good/desirable/etc, people attritbute that to chance. But, if your child is doing something wrong/incorrect/undesirable/etc, that gets chalked-up to your parenting.
There is no sense in trying to make children grow up any faster than they already do.
There is no better compliment than someone whose opinion you value saying that you are good parents - and meaning it.
Parenting is deeply personal.
Use the words "I promise" sparingly. There are very few things you can actually guarantee your child and broken promises really hurt.
As a parent, there are some things you do because you think you're supposed to...And then there are the things you do because you know you have to.
There's nothing quite like a conversation with a two-year old.
The development of language is mind-boggling! And so much fun to watch develop!
Everything happens for a reason. Everything. Even though it's sometimes hard to figure out why.
Traveling with a toddler might be a trip, but it definitely is not a vacation.
"Wean" doesn't have to be a four-letter word.
It is true what the say - the days are long, but the years are short. Happy first birthday Josephine!
The baby's needs always come first. (Case in point: her dinner was a well-balanced, all-organic meal of turkey, cheddar cheese cubes, vegetable hummus & raisins for dessert. Mine was a bowl of Coco Crispies.)
I thought that first smile was a good as it got...until the day she first reached out for me. I knew that was the best feeling in the world...Until she looked at me and said "Mama!" :)
There are two kinds of people in the world - those who wave back to a baby in stroller & those who don't.
Mother's Day & Father's Day are definitely more than "Hallmark Holidays."
The people who designed the Sesame Street characters knew what they were doing!
Babies do not understand time zones!
There is no shame in buying a one-piece bathing suit. ;)
Time spent just sitting and staring at Josephine is time well spent! The fact that we created her and the fact that she is ours still amazes me every single day. We are totally in awe of our beautiful daugther!
Pureed beets and babies don't mix.
One of "those nights" is usually followed by one of "those days."
Blowing bubbles is fun for the whole family.
Seven month olds definitely know how to dance!
Baby monitors are also useful for identifying when you've accidentally locked a cat in the baby's room.
With a little practice, it is possible to update the blog, talk on the phone, eat lunch, and pump breastmilk all at the same time. (Now that's what I call multi-tasking.)
A five month old baby does not know how to "pet" a cat. However, a five month baby is very good at making a cat really angry!
Diaper rash cream has lots of different uses!
There's no doubt in my mind that you would find a nasal aspirator / nose suction bulb in a museum of torture devices.
A cat's meow and a baby's cry sound oddly similar at 4am.
The hospital should keep all the samples of free formula and pass out white noise and Elizabeth Mitchell CDs instead!
The day Josie no longer wants to hold my hand will definitely be a sad day. In the meantime, I'm content to stay in her room a couple extra minutes in the middle of the night with her little hand wrapped tightly around my finger.
The holidays really are more special once you've started your own family.
When all else fails - just breathe & remain grateful! Even the worst days are the best days of our lives.
It's okay to do at least half of the things you swore you would never do as a parent.
Parenting means you must always be up for a change of plans - even if that means giving up dinner at your favorite restaurant for White Castle in the back seat while nursing your baby.
Never take an over-tired baby to the mall in a bassinet!
Those damn baby nail clippers are lethal weapons - I hope Josie won't miss the top half of her pointer finger!
Two sets of sheets are not enough.
It's okay to cry when you put away baby clothes that no longer fit anymore.
Strangers almost always hold the door open for a pregnant woman, but almost never do so for a woman with a stroller.
There is nothing like that first toothless smile!
You haven't lived until you've had to handle a diaper blowout SO BIG that the only way out of it is to cut your baby's clothes off of her to avoid covering her head with poo.
There is absolutely, positively nothing worse in the entire world that seeing your child in pain and not being able to help her.
Never leave home without an extra set of clothes for yourself & at least two extra sets of clothes for the baby.
Baby pee dries quickly and doesn't require a change of clothes (no one will ever know...)
Picking little baby boogers is more fun than it should be.
If Josie is totally relaxed and smiling, she probably just pooped.
Thank goodness the baby doesn't realize I usually don't know what the heck I'm doing.
Lou has missed his calling as a performer of children's songs & should definitely look into recording his smash hit "Mama's Milk".
Nipples stretch like rubberbands.

Three Schneiders

Friday, December 3, 2010

Peaceful Parenting & Positive Discipline

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